Eminen speaks on drug addiction & learning how to rap again…

15 Sep

If you watched the VMA’s you witnessed Eminem receive two moonmen for categories “Best Hip Hop Video” and “Best Male Artist”.   Although this is a beautiful thing, I was wondering for a while, where was he the past few years?  The answer…he was battling a serious drug addiction that almost cost him his career.   Recently, Marshall Mathers interviewed with the NY Post to speak of what made him “hate” himself and how he overcame his evils. 

Excerpts from interview below:

Do you remember when you took your first pill?

I took my first Vicodin when I was 24 or 25. I liked anything with codeine in it. It was easy in the beginning. I didn’t have the money to get really involved in drugs. I’d do them when somebody offered them to me. As my career took off and the crowds got larger and life got faster, I reached out for that sh – – more and more. I used it as a crutch to calm my nerves. Especially the sleeping pills

What impact did the pills wind up having on your music?

They stifled me — they stopped my brain off. I don’t know if I was frying brain cells or what, but I couldn’t think. The drugs also made me lazy.

How did they make you lazy?

I was lazy about everything. I’d get high and say, “F – – – writing rhymes. I wanna sit down, watch some TV and eat nachos — and watch more TV.”

Was there a point when you knew you’d hit rock bottom?

Looking back on it now, I realize my rock bottom was my overdose [in December 2007]. But when I was deepest in the hole was when I realized I can’t do any sh – – anymore. No drugs, pills or any kind of mood stimulant — not even NyQuil. I can’t do any of that because I like it too much.

Did you go to rehab with other addicts? Or did you get help privately?

I did it at home. I went to my friends and said I really need help, but I can’t go back to rehab [like I did in 2005]. I’m not knocking the rehab system, but it didn’t work for me. I wouldn’t open up — I didn’t really think I belonged there.

What was wrong with rehab?

It was too much craziness. It’s all supposed to be anonymous, but being unknown isn’t possible for me — come on! When I walked into rehab the first time, I felt like I was a cartoon character who walked into a room with real people and all eyes were on me. It was too much for me.

Has fighting addiction been a humbling experience?

I don’t think I ever thought of myself as Superman. But there were people who thought of me that way, and maybe I believed them a little. With drugs I knew I’d let my kids down. I thought, “What if they looked at me like I was Superman and all I ever do is disappoint them?” I felt weak and knew I wasn’t supposed to be weak.

Read more: http://www.nypost.com/p/entertainment/music/losing_myself_PT0Nnh4CJfFdcPtsAtQnJK/1#ixzz0zcSPO37b

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